How to help add vision to your game

I always thought everyone had it.

I thought people thought the same.

I thought people thought like me as I grew up constantly on guard against the world.

(When both parents have PTS and your brother dies when you’re 12, it creates a world where you are constantly on guard).

I notice a lot.

I notice patterns in people.

And I need constant stimulation (I get mentally stuck when I’m living in a rut). I like discipline, but I need a change in scenery from time to time.

Last weekend, I went to a small town I had never been to. Now, days later, I put myself back in the town. I remember the buildings, the stores, the food, and some of the people and I can replay the day in my mind.

Something I thought every person does.

In two weeks, I’m taking my kids down to Florida for vacation and to see their grandparents.

“Can you “walk” through their condo,” I asked my daughters.

One daughter “walked” me through their condo. The details she remembered made me laugh. She has what I have.

Mental picturing.

I remember a good amount from my childhood.

Recently, I ran into a guy I hadn’t seen since high school (I graduated in 92’ You do the math). He was excited to see me. He even wanted to catch up. All I could think about was the time he cut me in line during soccer practice when we were 9 years old and we had to run laps for fighting.

So, I remember the negatives about people. I remember the times they annoyed me (which is probably why my writing comes off as “Salty”). I also remember the “paybacks.” When I first watched the movie Billy Madison, I laughed at the end when the guy crossed Billy off his list.

**I’m sidetracking**

Can’t anyone improve their vision?

As a parent, when my kids couldn’t sleep I would tell them to focus on a situation at school and find five ways to recreate it.

Haha.

Doesn’t every parent tell their kids that?

I was teaching them a process I used back when I was a kid (and currently).

Both my parents instilled it in different ways.

My mother noticed everything visually.

“Look at that fat ass,” “Look at that ugly person” “That person has a big nose” “Why do they put such and such here…it should go there”

So, what do you think I’m going to do?

Notice every little thing about everyone.

I’m going to notice every little thing about you (especially after my mind takes the picture). If you have flaws, I will find them.

My Dad lived in his brain. I’d catch him lying awake in the morning on his bed and wondering what he was staring at.

The guy was going over his day in his head. He was visualizing his day and what the plan was.

And he was hypersensitive to it and was constantly “rehearsing.”

“Hey Dad, can I go over to the neighbors to play?” I would ask him while he was sitting at the kitchen table.

He was writing something down.

I hadn’t noticed.

“Dad.”

“WHAT?”

“Can I go over to the neighbors to play?”

“Why you asking me? Ask your mother.”

Two seconds later a fist hit the table.

“You made me forget what I was doing!”

I learned to get the hell out of there to avoid getting backfisted.

The good ole days.

Why am I telling you this?

Vision comes from our surroundings.

It comes from our environment.

It comes from our parents.

I’m sure it can come from outside circumstances as well.

Just not in my case.

Outside the home was my playground.

Inside, you followed the rules, or you…learned not to make mistakes.

Mistakes came with consequences.

This is why when I coach I generally have something hanging over the game.

I learned that having something on the line…a consequence…made players get smarter. It made them PAY ATTENTION to details.

But, it also has its limitations (not many really, other than the emphasis on winning).

Consequences “sear” the memory.

On the court, it “sears” the loss and makes you want to improve so it never happens again.

**People watching**

Have you ever sat back and watched people? Their tempo. Their gait. Their mannerisms.

At breakfast the other day I saw another Dad staring at the menu and I laughed. I knew what he was thinking. He was looking at all the crap on the menu and having trouble deciding what to get (like me). His eyes stared for a second, contemplating the dish, then moved to another one, stared, and contemplated again.

The process went on for a few minutes and I could see he was deep in thought and struggling with a decision until his eyebrows lifted and he put the menu down and “woke up.”

I can’t help people watching.

In those moments, I have to look around and see if there’s another watcher.

A lot of people people watch, but the “scanners” are hard to come by.

It’s in the eyes.

In a way, it keeps me sharp.

One exercise I want to play with my kids the next time we go to Boston is to make a stranger “Wait.”

Find a person who is in a hurry and slow them down. Points are given for the amount of times they try to get past you.

I’m half kidding.

But, I try to work on their observational skills so they are “Seeing” what is going on.

The only negative is the control aspect.

Like anything, it can be addicting (to annoy people/prank people).

It gets intense when you find another “game” going on.

Last year, out of boredom, or out of curiosity, I put peanut shells on the ground at the Park (I won’t say which one for fear the gig will be up…but probably not) and watched as unsuspecting players in the game crunched the peanut shell as they walked by and got confused.

-You can only put one shell “in play” per player.

-Points are given per crunch

-a “kick and a crunch” are valued higher and break into two categories…kick and crunch left foot or kick and crunch right foot. Hahaha. This is insane. I know.

-A double crunch has higher value too (like the same person crunches it twice).

-Negative points for a “picker upper” (gotta watch for those cleaners).

-Bonus points for your kick and crunch (like if you kick it under a moving foot).

Life is never dull when you are hanging with this cuckoo bird.

True story.

Years ago I was eating Ben and Jerry’s at Mohegan Sun Casino and I may or may not have “Flipped” some ice cream on the ground where the gamblers were moving from one location to another like ants to sugar (known as a Hot Spot). After a few minutes a guy, “heeled” the ice cream and did the splits.

I still have the guy in my head.

I still don’t know how he saved himself from going down.

The moral is to put my face on a wanted poster.

Last summer my nine-year-old and I found a “Choke point” at a festival in the streets of Boston. We kept putting a clear plastic container (like the ones for sandwiches) in “Play.” We must have watched it for 20 minutes as people kept kicking it accidentally.

So, what does all this have to do with tennis?

It’s about laying traps on the court. But you have to have some way of working on this off the court.

It is what it is.

Building combinations to sucker people into hitting the wrong shot.

You can’t tell me the top four don’t have a similar mindset to pranking.

It takes one to know one.

The process is sped up by working on your observation skills.

(You also can’t tell me you're not a life cheater. I’ve never met someone perfect. But, I know a lot of people who think they are).

**I wasn’t going to tell you this but check out PaulEkman.com**

If you read my stuff and are like me…it will open your mind.

I’m going to have my daughters study this.